Lady of the Imperial City by Laura Kitchell

Author:Laura Kitchell
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: romance, historical romance, japanese history, japanese romance, asian history, heian japan, japanese historical
Publisher: Laura Kitchell

* * * *

Yūkan closed the door to Kirei’s wing and moved across her public room, his feet keeping time with the rhythm of her words. He joined her in the Namu Amida Butsu formula, its words a part of him because he’d said them so often.

She looked gorgeous. Clean and young and inviting. Her pale robes mirrored the dew-glistening vegetation serving as her background, and the pinkish-orange of her chemise acted as a dash of sunlight at hem and sleeves.

He sat and scooted into the opening beside her. He’d expected her to demand he leave, or to lacerate his ego with her sharp tongue at the least. She didn’t stop, however.

She cut her gaze his way for a second then returned her attention to the garden. He adjusted his pitch a tad deeper. She held steady. Together, they meditated on Amida’s name in enchanting harmony. They finished on a long note as sunlight went from molten gold to liquid yellow, signaling dawn’s end.

“I’m mad at you,” she said quietly, not sparing him a glance.

He followed her gaze to a couple of ducks swimming circles on placid water. “For leaving when you asked me to stay?”

“And for coming today when I said not to.”

A breeze ruffled her sleeve, mussing the layers. Restoring their neatness, he smoothed a hand across the incredibly soft fabric. He studied her lovely, pale profile. She didn’t wear cosmetics this morning, and he caressed the back of his fingers along her cheek.

“I had to see you. I need you to understand that I refused your bed because…” He swallowed hard.

“Because why?” Her eyebrows arched slightly.

He took a deep breath. “Because there’s more to life than beauty and pleasure. I’ve been watching gentlemen at court, and I doubt any of them have the education necessary to fully understand the Lotus texts. They don’t really read them, either. They quote a few memorable lines from the beginning, middle, and end. Or worse, they pay priests to intone the sutras for them. It’s shallow and meaningless. They don’t care.”

“And you do? You fully understand the Lotus? You care?” She looked him in the eyes and arched her eyebrows higher.

He leaned nearer. “Yes, I care. Yes, I read the texts in their entirety again and again. Each time, I discover a new truth. A better understanding. I’m a deeper person than any I’ve met here, save you and Emperor Ichijō. I need a deeper experience than one night of pleasure with you. You deserve a real commitment.”

Her brow furrowed, but she didn’t move. “Don’t you believe that all is vanity?”

“No.”

“Buddha teaches that all existence involves suffering.”

He reached into the folds of her sleeve and found her fingers. Taking her hand in his, he said, “He doesn’t teach that we have to suffer alone. Amida’s merciful. He promised to deny himself nirvana until everyone in the world is saved. Do you believe this?”

She slowly nodded. “I adhere to the Tendai and the belief in salvation by Amida. Whatever anyone else does, I’ll always recite my prayers to Amida Buddha.

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